Wedding Humour: the Pitfalls and Pleasures 3.
One sometimes wonders how it is that opposites attract
Then suddenly converge as one – an itemised known fact.
The imagery that comes to mind is girls and boys next door.
It must be there’s a sympathy or barely conscious draw
Between youngsters brought up in towns with a similar heritage.
Or perhaps there is some other not too discenible link.
Let's take, for example, narrow boat connections –
They're ideal for slow maturing of affections –
Just the sort of common theme which makes you stop and think
Oh, Mr Lock-keeper what should I do?
We thought they’d get wed in Nottingham
Not end up here near Crewe.
We need to sort that puzzle out as quickly as we can.
Oh, Mr Lock-Keeper extract us from this jam.
Wouldn’t it be great if we could leave the motorways
And slow boat to this wedding on inland waterways?
We could set out from Diglis, a basin on the Severn,
And get to Stanley Reservoir and then push on to Endon
By chugging slowly up the stream by way of Stourport
Lock.
Of course, all that’s mere fantasy. We’ll use the
Motorways.
But travelling from Worcester – famed for Parian ware –
We realise there’s another link between this bridal
Pair:
The shadow of fine porcelain across their long school days.
Oh, Mr Ratner what should I do?
“The rings I brought for enlargement
are needed up near Crewe
Please get them off your pawned goods tray, as quickly as
You can,
So I don’t appear more foolish than I currently feel I am.”